Posted in Begin again., Embracing the pain of separation, Fight back, Something real, Soothing struggles

Felt Like A Fool

Last few years were so unfortunate that it keeps me awake even today. Sometimes I just feel like punishing myself really hard for accepting the apology but not denying to trust again. Deep down I already knew that I was just the object of desire, that people really liked me for a thousand reasons and all of them wanted to walk with me when the sun sets. So let’s agree to disagree because I either keep it all inside as silence is the best reply to a shock or tell exactly how I feel with no filter. I’m really sorry for the mean, awful and accurate things I might say because I was always told that be everyone’s friend but nobody’s fool but I just got caught, maybe I chose the darkness.

Continue reading “Felt Like A Fool”

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Posted in Begin again., Fight back, Something real, Soothing struggles

Deals With The Devil

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Hey, silvered-tongued devils, y’ll gotta protect yourself ’cause I ain’t gonna be there but karma.

Hey, opportunists, I know y’ll really need me but find another prey I ain’t got time anymore.

Hey, zany devils, I’ve realized my fault too early and in the end we all die alone.

Devil, when I had angel inside me I found one in you too.

I let my hand hold thine.

When I had the crowd looking for mine.

Close your eyes and remember the past time.

You’ll see why today my heart is ravine.

Wasn’t ever attached to you

Yet felt estranged.

Too old at heart to get hurt

You are replaceable, it’s a no brainer.

Continue reading “Deals With The Devil”

Posted in Soothing struggles

Even Blood Couldn’t Bind Us

I love chess and honestly nobody till now with whom I’ve played this game has ever defeated me the only person who did is my younger brother because I taught him the tactics to play this game.

I wasn’t from those lucky elder sisters who got to see their brother’s childhood. Our circumstances had separated us for eight years and he never really recognized me during our early childhood days. After our father’s death, we moved together with our Mom to a different place and we were still kids. Continue reading “Even Blood Couldn’t Bind Us”

Posted in Something real, Soothing struggles

Empty Days

Everybody for once or twice in their life, must’ve gone through those days when we do not want to share our pain because it feels like we’re mocking ourselves. We listen to motivational and inspirational speeches but it never really works. When we want to enjoy but we get overwhelmed.

When they come to us whenever they need our help and for the rest of the time we are left all alone. When we are understanding and our fellas behaves as if they need a chance to prove us wrong, to make us feel like it’s always our mistake.

When slowly and then gradually the pearls comes out of the thread.

When memories are stains.

When silence is a shield.

When tomorrow is a fear.

When beauty seems fake and ugliness attracts.

When we are the most negative person filled with questions.

when we want to live but we just can’t help it.

Continue reading “Empty Days”